Published in the UK by Scholastic, 2022

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Scholastic Ireland, 89E Lagan Road, Dublin Industrial Estate, Glasnevin,

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SCHOLASTIC and associated logos are trademarks and/or

registered trademarks of Scholastic Inc.

Text © Dr Emily MacDonagh, 2022

Illustrations by Josefina Preumayr © Scholastic, 2022

Cover illustration by Josefina Preumayr

Author photograph © Holly Clark, 2021

Produced with the help of:

Emily Hibbs

Consultant Paediatrician: Dr Rebecca Mann

School Nurse: Charlene Hayes

Dr Emily MacDonagh is represented by The CAN Group

ISBN 978 07023 1096 6

A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

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1 3 5 7 9 10 8 6 4 2

This book is dedicated to all families who are trying to

navigate the journey through puberty.

To my amazing husband Pete, thank you for always supporting me.

Also, to our amazing collection of children: Junior, Princess, Millie and

Theo, who all keep me on my toes!

To my mum and dad who taught me pretty much everything you will read

here. Mum – I can’t thank you enough for being my medical expert for this

book, although I think it was actually your parental expertise that helped

the most! Dad – your words of wisdom are invaluable to me.

Finally, to my little brothers (who are not so little any more)

Tom, Sam, Will and Joe.

I love you all xx

Introduction: A Bumpy Road .................................................6

What’s the Point of Puberty?..............................................10

Part One: Changes in Your Body

GETTING KICK-STARTED...........................................................................12

DEVELOPING BREASTS.............................................................................20

GROWTH SPURTS.....................................................................................24

CHANGING SHAPE....................................................................................28

DOWN BELOW..........................................................................................30

STARTING YOUR PERIOD..........................................................................33

HAIRY BITS..............................................................................................44

GETTING SWEATY.....................................................................................48

KEEPING CLEAN.......................................................................................52

SKIN AND SPOTS.....................................................................................55

Contents

Part Two: Changes in Your Mind

CHANGING BRAINS...................................................................................60

FIRST CRUSHES.......................................................................................64

BODY CONFIDENCE...................................................................................68

HEALTHY HABITS.....................................................................................71

KEEPING ACTIVE.....................................................................................76

BE TRUE TO YOURSELF............................................................................80

FAMILIES, FRIENDS AND FEELING SUPPORTED.......................................83

Part Three: What About the Boys?..........................................86

So what now? An Amazing Journey......................................90

Glossary......................................................................................92

Useful Links...................................................................................94

INDEX............................................................................................96

Introduction

A BUMPY ROAD

Growing up is like travelling down a long, bumpy road. At the

start, it seems like the road goes winding on for ever! There

are twists and turns, and ups and downs. Sometimes it’s a fun

adventure, and sometimes it feels like the hardest journey in

the world. All of us travel down this road, but we go at our own

pace, in our own time. In this book, I’m going to help guide you

down the road to growing up, pointing out the bumps, twists

and turns along the way. By the time you’ve finished reading,

you should know what to expect, and hopefully feel

excited about the journey!

7

I’m sure you’ve heard of puberty. It’s a word adults bring up

a LOT, without always explaining what it’s all about. Really,

puberty just means growing up. It means all the changes our

bodies go through to transform from a child into a teenager

into an adult. The idea of puberty can sometimes seem a bit

scary, but in this book I’ll talk you through the changes – big

and small – that are coming. Getting to grips with what your

body might do before it starts doing it will mean there’s no

reason to feel worried or confused when things begin to

happen.

Nice to Meet You!

I’m Dr Emily, and I work for the

National Health Service (NHS). I

went to university for five years to

study medicine, where I learned

all about the changes children and

young people go through during puberty.

Then I started working as a doctor, which I have done for the

last six years. I have worked in all sorts of places, and have

loved meeting so many different people. Being a doctor can

be tough, but it is also an amazing job because you can help

people at difficult times in their lives.

I have four (yes fOur!) younger brothers, who I watched grow

up, and I have also seen my two stepchildren growing from

infancy to Instagram! I am now bringing up my own children

and I have really sussed out the easy bits, the hard bits and

8

the questions everyone wants to ask about puberty but are

too embarrassed to… I’ve had lots of practice in explaining

how growing up works over the years and now I’ve put all

that knowledge in a book so that YOU can find out all about

it too. The most important thing I want you to know is that

no question is silly or embarrassing. If you want to know the

answer to something, chances are someone else will too. The

more we speak out and ask those tricky questions, the easier it

will become for everyone to get the information they need!

Over the following few chapters, I’ll take you through the

journey of puberty, explaining the things that will happen to

your body and why. This book is mostly about girls’ bodies,

but we’ll have a quick chat about what’s happening to the

boys, too. Before we get into it, let’s start with this book’s most

important message:

You are totally unique!

Everyone goes through puberty in

their own way, at their own time.

There really is no

right or wrong way

to grow up.

9

Mind Mayhem

During puberty, as well as physical changes, your mind

will go through changes, too. Sometimes the changes in

the way you think and feel can seem even scarier than the

changes happening in your body. You might feel really moody

sometimes, or your emotions might go wild. This is all a normal

part of growing up, and things will soon settle down, I promise!

Remember, every adult you know has already gone through

puberty. Everyone from your granny, to your head teacher to

your favourite popstar, YouTuber or TikToker. If they can do it,

so can you. YOu are nOt alOne.

There are lots of fantastic things about growing up – you can

become more independent, get your dream job, and earn

your own money. You can travel around the world, explore new

places and meet new friends. You can start making decisions

about what you want to do and who you want to be, so that

you can make the most of your life. But to get from where you

are now to where you’ll end up, you’ll have to travel down that

long, bumpy road we were talking about earlier. By reading this

book and finding out all about puberty, you might not make

the road any smoother, but at least you’ll know what bumps are

coming!

Ready to get started?

What’s the Point

of Puberty?

You might be wondering why we all have to go through

puberty in the first place. Why dO Our bOdies need tO change?

They wOrk perfectly well as they are, dOn’t they? The

changes that happen during puberty get your BOdy anD BrAiN

ready tO bE aN AdUlT so you can do things like have a baby if

you want to. Not everyone wants to have, or can have, children

and that’s fine! But it’s still important for your body and brain

to develop during puberty. Sometimes, people focus on the

changes they can see, but the changes you feel inside are just

as important. You’ll discover new things about yourself and get

to know your feelings. You might start becoming interested in

different activities and develop close friendships

with new people.

11

There are lots of tricky terms to keep track of when we talk

about puberty and growing up. You’ll find a list of the most

important ones in the glossary at the back of the book.

ALL CHANGE!

Here are a few of the changes girls go through during puberty.

We’ll look at all of these in much more detail later in the book.

It sounds like a lot of BiG changes when you see them all

together like that, doesn’t it? Don’t worry, you’re not going

to wake up one day looking and feeling completely different.

These changes will happen over months or even years, and

you’ll have plenty of time to get used to them.

YOu’ll start tO grOw breasts

yOu’ll grOw talleryOur hips will get wider

YOu might put weight On in different areas Of

yOur bOdy, such as yOur upper arms and hips

yOu’ll start having periOds.

hair will grOw On yOur legs and arms, under

yOur armpits and in yOur pubic area (near

yOur private parts)

YOu might sweat mOre

YOu might get spOtty skin

YOu might feel new Or cOnfusing emOtiOns

Part One:

CHANGES IN YOUR BODY

Getting Kick-started

When it comes to puberty, your brain runs the show. A

special part of your brain, called the pituitary gland, has a very

important role to play. You can think of it like the conductor of

an orchestra, telling each of your body parts what they need

to do and when. First, it tells your body to grow and change

in different ways. Then, it tells your emotions and thinking to

mature, too, so that you’re ready to deal with life as an adult.

The only trouble is, your body develops before

your mind, so you might not always feel ready

for the changes!

13

Your brain organizes things in your body so you gradually

move from being a child to being a teenager (also called

‘adOlescence’) to being an adult. These changes happen at

different times for different people. There’s no right age for

them to begin but puberty usually begins sometime between

the ages of eight and fourteen. When the brain decides

it’s time, it sends out some messages to get things going.

It does this through chemicals called hormones, which act

like messengers travelling around your body. Here’s how it

happens:

Step one: your brain sends a message to your ovaries to

start making a hormone called oestrogen.

Step two: the oestrogen slips into your bloodstream and

arrives at your breast area. Here, it triggers your breasts to start

growing.

Step three: a gland in your tummy starts producing a

whole new set of hormones, called androgens. Androgens are

even more important for boys, but they have some jobs to do

in girls, too…

Step four: the androgens make hair grow under your

armpits and around your genitals.

Step five: meanwhile, the oestrogen is still busy making

further changes. As well as making your boobs bigger, it also

14

makes your genitals bigger, and your uterus increases in size

so that your body is ready to have a baby some day, if you want

to. Girls’ genitals are mostly on the inside of their bodies.

This is what they look like:

female bodies where

babies grow during

pregnancy. It stretches

to get bigger as a baby

inside it grows.

4 Cervix The

opening at the bottom

of the uterus, which

connects it to the vagina.

1 Ovaries Female bodies

have two ovaries, which release

egg cells. These eggs are already

in your body when you are born! Your

body doesn’t make new ones, so you

have a limited amount. When you start

your periods, your body releases an egg

from your ovary around once a month.

6 Clitoris A small, round

bump at the top of your labia, which is

very sensitive.

7 Labia Folds of skin that protect

your vagina, which get bigger during

puberty.

8 Urethra The tube through which

urine leaves the body.

2 Fallopian tubes Tubes

connecting your ovaries to your

uterus, which your eggs travel down.

3 Uterus (womb) The organ in

5 Vagina A stretchy

tube which connects your

uterus to the outside of

your body. During your

period, blood travels

out of your body

through your vagina. It

is also where babies are

born from.

2

5

6

8

7

3

1

4

15

As well as your vagina, you have two other openings near your

genital area. The urethra is where your urine (wee) comes out,

and the anus is where your faeces (poo) comes out. These

don’t change during puberty, though.

Just in case you were wondering, here’s what boys’ genitals

look like:

In Your Own Time

Everyone goes into puberty at different times. There’s no need to

panic if you are the smallest person in the class and everyone else

seems to be growing boobs and starting their periods. It might

feel like you’re tiny, and that you’ll be ‘left behind’ for ever. But

remember the story of the hare and the tortoise? The speedy

hare challenged the slow tortoise to a race, thinking it would

be an easy win. The hare sprinted off so fast he shot MiLeS

3 Penis An organ which leads

from the inside of a boys’ body

to the outside. The urethra runs

through the penis, so boys wee out

of the opening at the end of their penis, and it can also release sperm. Sperm are

special cells which, if they meet with an egg in a female body, can grow into a baby.

4 Urethra The tube through which urine leaves the body.

1 Testicles Two balls which

make sperm. They also make

hormones (especially testosterone)

which trigger changes in boys’

bodies during puberty.

2 Scrotum A bag of skin

which holds a boy’s testicles.

1

2

3

4

16

ahead of the plodding tortoise. But then the hare stopped

for a quick break, and fell asleep under a tree. The tortoise

shuffled on, overtook the hare and won the race!

Being one of the last to go through puberty is a bit like that.

You might feel left behind when everyone else is having their

growth spurts, but once they’ve stopped growing you’ll catch

them up, and may even overtake them. Of course, puberty isn’t

a race, and it’s not something you can ‘win’. But it’s important

not to worry if you’re more of a tortoise than a hare – just

remember you’ll get there in the end!

Making a baby

In this book I say that the physical purpose of puberty is to get

your body ready to have a baby when you are a fully grown

adult. The diagrams so far have shown you the parts of your

body that are important during puberty but it is also worth

talking about how you actually get pregnant because it can

seem a bit confusing at first.

To make a baby you need a male sperm and a female egg. On

page 15 there is a diagram of a boy’s genitals where we talk

about sperm, the special cells that if they meet an egg in a

female body, can grow into a baby. The million dollar question

is how does the sperm get to the egg?

The sperm are created in the testicles, down in the boys’ scrotum,

and the female’s egg is made inside the tummy in the ovary.

17

When a woman and her partner feel they are ready to have a baby

they have sex – the proper name for this is ‘sexual intercourse’.

When grown-ups know each other well and are in love, sex is a

normal part of a caring adult relationship. During sex, the man’s

sperm is released into the vagina and if the sperm meets the egg,

that’s when the egg can be fertilized and the woman can become

pregnant. This is the earliest part of growing a baby.

Clever Chemicals

There are lots of different hormones whizzing around your

body during puberty, all doing different jobs. For girls,

two of the most important hormones are oestrogen and

progesterone. Progesterone’s main job is to make changes

in your uterus (the part of your body where a baby grows).

Oestrogen causes many different changes in your body,

including…

Making breast tissue grow.

Making you grow taller. Some hormones will make you grow

taller, but when you have more oestrogen in your body it will

actually slow your growth down. This explains why women

are generally shorter than men.

Encouraging your body to store fat in different areas, such

as your hips, thighs and breasts. This means that women

often have more fat in their bodies than men, which is

completely normal and healthy.

18

What Happens When?

For most girls, puberty follows a fixed order once it has got

started. That looks something like this:

1 You might notice

small, hard lumps

called breast buds

behind your nipples.

That’s your breasts

beginning to grow.

2 You might start to make a bit more

sweat under your armpits, and generally

get a bit more ‘smelly’ when you’re doing

sport or feeling hot.

3 Hair will

start growing

in your armpits

and around your

private parts.

4 The outside bits of your

genitals (the labia) will get a

bit bigger and more

noticeable.

5 Gradually, you’ll get more

armpit hair and more hair around

your private parts. Your boobs

will continue growing. (Eventually

they will reach a ‘final size’ and

stop growing, but that might take

several years.)

6 You’ll start your periods. That’s a whole new set of changes

that we’ll talk about later, or you can flick ahead to page 33 now!

It is common to be curious about the changes that are happening

to your body. Everyone has a look at themselves in the mirror –

it’s how you get to know your body. It is perfectly normal to want

to know about the changes that are happening to your body, so

don’t be embarrassed to feel about and check on things or even

ask a parent if you’re worried that something isn’t normal.

Developing Breasts

One of the first signs of puberty is your breasts beginning to

grow. The first thing you might notice is a small lump the size

of a pea or button under your nipple, called a breast bud. The

breast buds might feel a bit painful in the shower, or when your

roll over in bed or play sport. In fact, when your breasts start to

develop, they can feel really tender! This is because your body

is growing some completely new tissue. As the skin and breast

tissue grows, it stretches and is really delicate. The hormones

in your body can also make your breasts feel a bit painful, but

this is a normal part of breast development and is nothing

to worry about. When your periods start, you might notice

your breasts are painful at certain times before or during your

period, too. This is also because of the hormones in your

body, and is completely normal.

21

As your boobs begin growing, they’ll usually start off quite

pointy. The darker skin around your nipple (the areola) can be

raised. In time, your boobs will become a more rounded shape.

It can several years for them to grow to their final size.

Q: One of my boobs is bigger than the other.

Am I weird?

A: Definitely not! It’s really common to have one boob

bigger than the other, just like how lots of people have

one foot slightly bigger than the other. Your boobs also

might not grow at the same time, or at the same speed.

You might think there’s a really noticeable difference

between their sizes, only for them to even out a few

months later.

Even if the difference in your boob size seems like the

most obvious thing in the world to you, I promise you

no one else will have a clue. If you’re feeling really

worried or self-conscious, you could talk to an adult you

trust about it, and consider putting a little bit of padding

on the smaller side, just for your own peace of mind.

Boobs come in all shapes and sizes, so whatever yours end

up looking like, they are totally normal!

Ask Doctor Emily

22

23

Choosing a Bra

When your boobs get bigger and heavier, you might want to

consider wearing a bra. You 100% don’t have to wear a bra if

you don’t want to, but you might find that your boobs are a

bit uncomfortable when you’re doing sport or running around,

particularly if they are big. Bras can give your boobs support

and make things comfier for you in your day-to-day life.

If you do want to start wearing a bra, some shops offer a

bra-fitting service, or there are lots of online guides for how to

measure your own chest before you go bra shopping. Here are

some tips for finding the best bra:

A good bra should…

• fit snugly around your chest

• have cups that fit comfortably around your boobs

A good bra should not…

• have straps that dig in to your shoulders

• pinch or scratch your skin

• leave pink marks on your back (that means it’s too tight)

Growth Spurts

During puberty and your teenage years, you’ll grow

very fast. When you were little, you grew about two to five

centimetres a year. Amazingly, during puberty, this increases

to a whopping ten centimetres a year! So, you grow nearly

four times faster during puberty than at any other

time in your life.

25

So, how does all the growing stuff happen? Once again, the

pituitary gland – the conductor of the orchestra in your brain – is

in charge of telling all the other parts of your body what to do.

The pituitary gland produces special hormones known as growth

hormones. Your brain mainly produces growth hormones while

you’re sound asleep at night. This is actually one of the reasons

why you need more sleep as a teenager – more time snoozing

means more time for your brain to get to work making those

growth hormones!

These special hormones mostly affect the growth of your bones.

As your bones get longer, they gradually stretch your muscles

and ligaments. This stretching is why you might find you get

‘growing pains’ – aches and pains in your arms and legs. As your

muscles and ligaments get tugged and tightened, it can be

uncomfortable, especially at night. This will get better with time,

but if you’re feeling a bit sore or achy, try sleeping with a hot

water bottle.

Tall or Short?

The thing about your height is you can’t really change it, so it’s

best to find a way to be happy as you are, whether you’re the

shortest girl in your class, or the tallest. People of all different

heights achieve amazing things, and sometimes their height can

play a factor in that. If you’re small, you might be really good at

horse riding or gymnastics. If you’re tall, you could be great at long

jump or rowing. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t be good at

the things you enjoy whatever height or body shape you are.

Simone

Biles

gymnast

142 centimetres

Lucy

Bronze

FOOTBALLER

171 centimetres

Greta

Thunberg

Activist

150 centimetres

Zendaya

Actress and

singer

177 centimetres

Maria

Sharapova

retired

Tennis player

188 centimetres

Malala

Yousafzai

Activist

161 centimetres

Changing Shape

As well as growing taller, your body will also change shape

during puberty. Most girls put on a bit of weight as their body

stores fat in different places. Along with your boobs getting

bigger, your hips will widen. Your wider hips might make your

waist look smaller, and make the top of your thighs a bit wider.

All bodies are good bodies, so try not to compare your shape

to your friends’ or to girls you see on social media.

Sometimes, it’s really easy to be critical about yourself. We

often break ourselves down into little bits, focusing on the

things we don’t like about our bodies. It’s strange, because

we don’t see other people that way! We don’t look at our

friends and see a collection of body parts; we see them for the

wonderful people they are.

So, let’s try and see ourselves that way, too –

as whole people.

As your body changes, try to focus on the things that make

you feel contented and confident as a whole person, and don’t

worry about the shapes and sizes of different bits of your body.

Down Below

Remember oestrogen, that important hormone that

makes your boobs grow? Well, it makes some things grow

bigger in your genital area, too. This is where the organs

involved in making babies are and that’s exactly why they

change – to get your body ready to have a baby

some day if you want to.

31

Most of this development goes on inside your body, but you’ll

see a few signs on the outside too. Your clitoris and labia will

get bigger and change shape. Because we don’t see each

other’s bits and bobs, it’s easy to worry that yours look strange.

I’m telling you now, they definitely don’t! Everyone’s private

parts look different, and there’s a huge range of shapes and

sizes! And guess what? They’re ALL normal...

32

Artist Jamie McCartney created a piece of sculpture called

‘The Great Wall of Vagina’, made up of over 400 plaster

casts of women’s private parts!

Oestrogen also makes the tissue in your genitals softer,

and they start making a small amount of whiteish liquid to

keep the delicate skin moisturized. This liquid might start

appearing in your pants at the earliest stage of puberty, often

at about the same time your boobs start growing. This liquid

is called discharge, which is a bit of an icky name, but it’s

nothing to be worried or ashamed about. All women have it,

and it helps to keep their private parts clean and healthy.

Some people stick on thin pads (liners) into their pants if the

discharge bothers them, but most girls and women don’t.

Showering or having a bath and changing your pants each day

is all you need to do to keep things clean down there.

Did you know?

Starting Your Period

Starting your periods and learning how to deal with them

so they don’t bother you can sometimes be the trickiest part

of growing up for girls. If you’re feeling a bit panicky about

the idea of periods, I hope that by the end of this section,

you feel more clued-up so that when yours does start,

it doesn’t faze you. Some people might call your period other

names, like ‘menstruation’ or ‘time of the month’.

34

As I’ve mentioned, puberty is your body getting ready so you

could have a baby in the future, if you wanted to. To do this,

your body has to start releasing an egg each month. If the

egg meets a sperm, it becomes ‘fertilized’ and has a chance

of growing into a baby in the future. The egg travels from

the ovary to your uterus (see diagram 1 below), which has

developed a lining in which the fertilized egg can plant itself

and then possibly grow into a baby over the nine months of

a pregnancy. If the egg isn’t fertilized, the egg and the lining

of the uterus pass out of your body, through your vagina (see

diagram 2). This means that each month, you’ll have a bit of

bleeding for a few days as the lining of the uterus is passed.

Everyone loses a different amount of blood each month: this

is how ‘heavy’ your period is. The funny thing is, it can feel like

you lose a lot of blood, but actually most people only lose a

tiny amount each time! The average person will lose about

six to eight teaspoons of blood with each period, with some

losing a little more and some a little less.

1 2

35

Q: How do I know when my period is going to

start for the first time?

A: It’s very hard to predict the exact day or week that

your period is going to start, and it often takes people by

surprise. It’s helpful to look for your body’s signs that your

first period might be on its way. This means you can get

ready by keeping a few period products in your school

bag, so you’re prepared and ready to go, wherever and

whenever you come on your period.

Signs to look out for are:

o whiteish discharge in your underwear

o your breasts starting to grow

o hair growing in your armpits or pubic area.

Once you notice these signs, your periods are likely to start

within a year or so. Do remember though that everyone is

different, and everyone will see slightly different changes to

their body before their periods start.

What to Expect

When you first start your period, you’ll see some blood in

your pants or when you wipe yourself after going to the loo.

Ask Doctor Emily

36

The blood isn’t coming from a cut or injury, so it doesn’t hurt.

However, because the muscles of your uterus squeeze a bit to

help the egg and lining pass through, you might get a gripey

pain in your tummy. The blood itself is not a sign of damage –

it’s just your body showing it’s working properly.

Having periods is not a secret or bad thing, and people often

let their friends or parents know when it is their period. You

don’t need to feel embarrassed or ashamed when you are

having your period. You are not dirty or gross. Unless you tell

them, most people will have absolutely no idea it’s your time

of the month anyway. Periods can feel personal though, so it’s

good to be able to manage that bit of blood independently,

that way you can do what you want without worrying about

being uncomfortable, and go where you want while feeling

confident!

Sanitary Products

During your period, you’ll need to use or wear something to

stop any blood leaking out or getting on your pants or clothes.

There are several different period products, sometimes called

sanitary products, designed to stop that bit of blood from

causing any bother.

Sanitary towels (pads) can be different shapes and

thicknesses. You stick them in your pants and change them every

few hours. You might need a larger, thicker pad at the start of

37

your period and at night, and then a

smaller, thinner one when there is less

blood, towards the end of your period.

Tampons look a bit like a stick of cotton wool with a short string

at the end. They fit inside your vagina, where they

absorb the blood. Tampons take a bit of time to

get used to, but once you have got the hang of

inserting them, they’re easy to manage. They are

also really useful, as you can go swimming when

wearing a tampon, but you can’t when wearing

a sanitary towel.

The key to making a tampon feel comfortable is putting it far

enough inside your vagina – if it is half in, half out it will be

uncomfortable, but when it is in the right place you won’t feel

it at all. Some tampons have ‘applicators’ which make it easier

to push them into your vagina. A tampon without an applicator

needs to be gently pushed in with your finger, which can be a

bit fiddly to begin with. In the same way you wouldn’t roughly

poke something into your nose or your ear, you’ll want to be

gentle with yourself when you’re putting a tampon in.

Most girls just starting their periods use towels and tampons,

and that’s what we focus on for this book. But there are other

period products available too, including eco-friendly period

pants, period cups and reusable pads.

38

These have the added benefit of being kind to the environment:

Period pants have extra layers to absorb

blood. You rinse them out with cold

water and pop them in the wash after

each use.

Reusable pads can be rinsed, washed and

worn again.

Period cups are small funnel-shaped cups which you

put in your vagina, a bit like a tampon. They can be

emptied, washed and used again.

If you’re feeling curious, why not ask an adult you trust if you

can buy a few different period products to have a look at? Take

them out of their packets and investigate how they work. If you

have a think about what product, or combination of products,

might be right for you when the time comes now, then that’ll

be one less thing to worry about!

Keeping Fresh, Staying Safe

You’ll need to change your period product regularly to stop it

leaking or becoming uncomfortable. The heavier your period

(the more blood you have) the more often you’ll need to

change. Periods can last anywhere from three to eight days;

39

they are often heaviest for the first two to three days, so you

might need to change a pad or tampon every time you go to

the toilet to begin with, perhaps four or five times a day. As the

week goes on, your period will get lighter, so you might only

need to change two or three times a day.

Changing your tampon is especially important. Swapping

your tampon every four to six hours or so is best, and you

shouldn’t leave it in longer than eight hours. Leaving in a

tampon for several days can cause a very rare but very serious

infection called toxic-shock syndrome, so it really is important

not to forget!

Choose the smallest-sized tampon possible for your flow. If you

notice that your tampon isn’t full when you go to change it, you

could try a smaller size. If your period is really heavy, it’s fine to

wear both a tampon and a pad, just to be on the safe side and

avoid any annoying leaks. However, you shouldn’t have to do

this regularly, so consider visiting your doctor if you’re having

really heavy periods every month.

What should I do with my used

sanitary towel or tampon?

There are special bins in most girls’ toilets for tampons and

sanitary towels. Just wrap your used pad in the wrapper of the

fresh pad you’ve stuck in your pants, and then chuck it away.

40

If you can’t see a special bin, don’t

panic. You can just wrap your pad

or tampon up in a bit of toilet

paper and put it in a normal bin –

no problem! The only thing you

shouldn’t do is flush your used pad

or tampon down the loo – it could block pipes, and even end up

in rivers or oceans where it can harm the environment.

Q: Will my periods hurt?

A: It is common to feel a bit of pain in your lower tummy

when you have your period. Sometimes the pain can begin

a day or two before you start having blood. The reason for

this is that the muscle inside your uterus is busy squeezing

the lining out. You also might not feel any pain, but your

tummy might feel a bit uncomfortable or bloated.

For most people, the pain isn’t too bad and can be

managed by having a rest or hugging a hot-water bottle.

Some people choose to take painkillers like ibuprofen or

paracetamol, but you should chat to an adult first before

taking any tablets or medicine.

For a few people, periods can be really painful and have

Ask Doctor Emily

41

a big impact on their lives. If your period pain is stopping

you from doing things you enjoy or making you feel down

then it’s a good idea to chat to an adult about arranging to

see your doctor. Your doctor can let you know some

different options to help make things better for you.

No Period Panic!

Still feeling nervous? Don’t be! Here are my top tips for

handling your time of the month, easy-peasy.

Always carry a period product so you don’t get caught off

guard. You can tuck it in a pocket or bag so that no matter

when or where your period starts, you can pop to the loo and

sort things out.

While you’re still getting used to your periods, there’s no

harm in going to the toilet a bit more regularly than you need

to. This way, you can check for leaks and change your period

product often. Try going every break or lunchtime at school,

and every couple of hours at home.

Carry a spare pair of pants in your bag, just in case!

Heavy Periods

Look out for signs that your period is really heavy, for example

if you are having to change your period products more than

every two hours. Another clue is if you are often bleeding right

42

through to your clothing or bedding. If this is happening to you,

it is something you should mention to an adult you trust, such as

a parent or school nurse. You can then decide whether to chat to

a doctor about things you could do to help make your periods

more manageable. Lots of doctors are women, and you can

always ask to speak to a female doctor if that would make you

feel more comfortable when you’re chatting about period stuff.

Periods and Moods

Some girls find that they can feel a bit grumpy or down in the

dumps in the run up to their periods. This is sometimes called

‘being pre-menstrual’ or ‘pre-menstrual syndrome’. It’s a sign of the

changing hormones that your body is producing. It doesn’t usually

affect girls when they are just starting their periods and, so long as

you know about it and understand why you are feeling a bit out of

sorts, it’s not something to be worried about. If bad moods from

pre-menstrual syndrome are causing you problems though, it might

be worth talking to your doctor about how you’re feeling.

Period Planning

When you first start your periods, you might find that they

aren’t very regular. Perhaps you bleed for a few days one

month, then nothing happens for several months, then you

have some blood again. Eventually, this will settle into

a pattern. It’s good to make a note of when you start each

period, so you can make a good guess at when the next one

might come. This way, you can have everything you need ready

for when it arrives. Generally speaking, you start your period

43

every twenty-eight days, but anywhere between twenty-one

and thirty-five days is normal.

Q: What if I don’t start puberty between eight

and fourteen? Is there something wrong with me?

A: If you notice changes in your body happening before you

are eight, then you don’t need to feel worried. Speak to a

parent or an adult you trust, and they may suggest going to

see your doctor. Very often it is nothing to worry about; for

example, going through puberty early may just run in your

family! Sometimes your doctor might want to check you for

certain things that can cause puberty to start early.

If you are over fourteen and haven’t started puberty, this may

also just be something that runs in your family and often is

nothing to worry about. Just like early puberty, it is a good

idea to speak to an adult you trust if you are feeling anxious.

They might suggest seeing your doctor to make sure

everything is OK. It is very unusual for early or late puberty to

be a sign of any important problem – you might just be a

tortoise or a hare!

Ask Doctor Emily

Hairy Bits

So, as we’ve seen already, there’s a LOT going on in your

body during puberty. The conductor of it all – your brain – is

busy composing a symphony of changes. Then, it brings in yet

another part: a hormone called testosterone. In boys’ bodies,

testosterone is kind of like the lead musician, but in girls’

bodies, it has a less dramatic part to play.

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An increase in the levels of testosterone in girls’ bodies

contributes to growth spurts. Along with androgens,

testosterone also makes a different kind of hair grow in your

armpits and pubic area. The hair is usually quite dark and thick.

It’ll be more noticeable than your other body hair but it doesn’t

grow very long. Like growing boobs, or getting discharge,

having hair in your armpits and pubic areas is normal and

everybody – EVERYBODY – has it.

Axillary (armpit) hair Pubic hair

Your Brilliant Body Hair

Your body goes through a real hair journey starting from the

day you are born! Newborn babies are covered in a type of

hair called ‘lanugo hair’. The job of this hair is to help protect

the baby’s skin from the fluid in their mum’s tummy. After

the baby is born, the lanugo hair starts to be replaced with a

different type of hair, called ‘vellus hair’.

Vellus hair helps keep your body at the right temperature.

It looks pale, short and fluffy, and covers most of your skin –

46

even your eyelids! During puberty, your hair changes again

and becomes ‘terminal’. Sounds a bit scary, but all this means

is that some of the hair on your body becomes thicker and

darker, like the hair on your head (but shorter!). These terminal

hairs grow under your armpits and around your genital area,

but the more androgens you have, the more areas of your body

might grow this type of hair. As boys have more androgens,

they are generally hairier!

Lose It or Leave It?

As you get older, the amount of hair in your armpits and pubic

area will gradually increase. What you do with it is totally up

to you. Some girls choose to leave it just as it is. Some girls

choose to remove their armpit hair by shaving, waxing or

using hair-removal cream. Some girls also choose to remove

parts of their pubic hair, so that it doesn’t show when they go

swimming, for example. Also, some girls choose to remove hair

from their legs. You should do whatever makes you feel the

most comfortable and confident. Whatever you decide, you

should NEVER EVER worry about your body hair. It’s normal,

natural and all part of growing up.

Whether you choose to remove your body hair is a personal

choice, and you shouldn’t feel pressure to do so. If you do

choose to get rid of it, spend some time looking into the

different methods, and the pros and cons of each. Bear in

mind that removing hair can cause rashes, ingrown hair (hairs

that grow under your skin) and spots, so do it carefully and ask

47

for advice from a trusted adult first. It’s not a one-time thing,

either! Like the hair on your head, body hair does grow back

and will need to be shaved, waxed or removed with cream

repeatedly, if you do decide you don’t want it on your body.

Q: I’ve got hair on my face! Should I get

rid of it?

A: Lots of girls develop fine facial hair, commonly on their

upper lip. Before you even think about removing any facial

hair, trying stepping back from the mirror to see if it’s really

as noticeable as you think. You might believe that it’s super

obvious, when in reality nobody else can see it. If you’re

still concerned about it, or would just feel happier with it

gone, talk to an adult you trust about the different options

for bleaching, thinning or removing it. Make sure you have

your parent’s permission before trying any products

though and remember that the skin on your face can be

especially sensitive. It’s not a good idea to shave it, as the

stubble that grows back will probably feel prickly and look

darker as it hasn’t been exposed to the sun. That means

you’ll end up having to shave it over and over again.

Very rarely, excessive facial hair can be a sign of a medical

condition. If you are worried about your hair growth, it’s a

good idea to talk to your doctor.

Ask Doctor Emily

Getting Sweaty

You’ve already discovered how amazing your body is,

but the truth is, it is a bit fussy, too. It likes to be at the exact

temperature of 37°C for everything to work properly. Luckily,

your body has some tricks up its sleeve to keep itself at exactly

this temperature. Sweat is one of the ways your body cools

itself down when you start to get too warm, like when the

weather is really sunny or when you are exercising. Your body’s

temperature can also rise due to hormonal changes, illness or

stress, so your body will sweat more at these times too.

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When you start to get a bit hot, your brain sends hormone

messengers around your body to tell it to get sweating.

Sweat glands, which live just below the skin, respond to these

messages by mixing up water, salt and a few other bits. This

sweat leaves your body through invisible holes in your skin

called pores. When the sweat reaches the air, it turns into

vapour and evaporates, like how a puddle disappears on a hot

day. This process of evaporation is what cools your skin down.

You need to drink plenty of water when you’re sweaty, to

replace the water you’re losing through sweat. If you’ve ever

tasted your own sweat (like when it’s streaming down your

face during PE!) you’ll have noticed it tastes salty. No matter

how much sport you do, and how much you sweat, as long as

you drink plenty of water and eat a healthy balanced diet your

body will sort out your fluid and salt balance.

Stinky Sweat?

I bet you’ve heard one of your classmates walk into the

changing rooms and shout something like:

“

Urgh, it STINKS of sweat in here!

”

The smell we associate with sweat can be pretty strong, and it’s

not always very pleasant!

The interesting thing is that sweat doesn’t smell at all. It’s

actually bacteria on your skin breaking down your sweat that

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causes the ‘body odour’ smell! Often, we don’t notice our own

body smelling and a parent or friend might decide to kindly

point it out to us… Try not to take offence and remember it’s

a normal part of becoming an adult and pretty easy to sort

out. Make sure you are washing with soap every day, and most

people also use a deodorant or antiperspirant (which literally

means ‘anti sweat’!) to keep body odour at bay. A combination

of the two is best.

There’s no specific age you should begin using deodorant

or antiperspirant but if you notice your underarms feeling

sweaty or smelling whiffy, that’s probably a good time to start.

Deodorants add a nice smell and just cover up any stronger

smells from your armpits whereas antiperspirants actually

stop you from sweating, or dry up your sweat. These products

come as roll-ons, gels, sprays and creams and you can buy

them in any pharmacy or supermarket. Most people put on an

antiperspirant every time they wash or shower, so possibly even

a couple of times a day.

Keep in mind that some people don’t need to use deodorant

or antiperspirant at all. You’ve probably seen some silly

deodorant adverts that try to convince you you’ll clear a room

of people if you don’t buy their products… If you’re lucky

enough to be able to tackle your body odour just by taking

regular baths or showers and wearing clean clothes, then don’t

feel the pressure to buy something you don’t need.

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Even though some deodorants say they are ‘for girls’ and

some say they are ‘for boys’ they’re made with exactly the

same stuff. The only difference is the smell!

Q: Does having armpit hair make you sweat

more?

A: The amount that you sweat depends on lots of factors,

and is individual to you. Having armpit hair doesn’t make

you produce more sweat. However, hair can hold moisture,

so if you have hair under your armpits it can make you feel

like you are more sweaty. This sweat can lead to body

odour, as more sweat means more bacteria breaking it

down.

This doesn’t mean you need to remove the hair from your

armpits though. As long as you are washing daily and using

deodorant if you need to then having armpit hair shouldn’t

lead to having smelly armpits. Some women remove their

armpit hair purely because they prefer the way it looks, but

some choose to remove the hair to stop sweat becoming

trapped in it.

Did you know?

Ask Doctor Emily

Keeping Clean

The best way to keep clean is to have a bath or a

shower every day using mild soap and warm water. This

will help to clear away any bacteria, stopping it from

making nasty smells!

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If you’ve got sensitive skin or eczema, be especially careful

with the kind of soaps and body washes you use. Check with

a doctor or skin specialist about the kind of products that are

right for you, and avoid scrubbing any sore areas of your skin.

After you’ve had a bath or a shower, you should pat your skin

lightly, so it still stays a bit damp. This will help your skin absorb

any cream, gel or moisturizer you’ve been prescribed.

When it comes to your private parts, the inside of your vagina

is perfectly capable of cleaning itself – I mentioned the

whiteish discharge, this is simply your body’s way of keeping

things clean. You should gently wash the outside of your vagina

with plain, unperfumed soap every day. Avoid using perfumed

soaps as they can affect the delicate balance of bacteria and

the pH level (the acid/alkaline level) in the vagina, and might

even irritate it. During your period, it’s a good idea to wash the

area more than once a day.

Hair Care

The hormones that make your skin oily and create acne are the

same ones that can have an effect on your hair. Each strand

of hair has its own gland that produces oil, which keeps your

hair shiny and waterproof. During puberty, the glands produce

extra oils – this can make your hair look nice and shiny, but

sometimes it gets a bit too shiny and ends up greasy.

How often you should wash your hair depends on how greasy

it gets! Some people only need to wash their hair once a week,

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whereas others find their hair gets greasy after just a day or

two. If that’s you, there are some special shampoos made for

oily hair. When you do wash it, use warm water and just a small

blob of shampoo to make lots of bubbles. Don’t rub or scrub

too hard, as that might damage your hair or irritate your scalp.

After rinsing, you can use a conditioner if you like, but pick

one that’s suitable for oily hair if you need to. If you want to

use products to style your hair, remember some will add extra

grease, which might mean you need to wash your hair more

often. It’s a good idea to keep your brushes and combs clean

too, as otherwise they’ll transfer grease and dirt back into your

clean hair.

Feeling Fresh

It’s important to wear clean clothes, socks and underwear

each day. Natural materials, like cotton, wool and bamboo are

better at absorbing sweat than synthetic (artificial) materials

like polyester and Lycra. But whatever your clothes are made

from, you can still keep them feeling fresh and smelling clean!

You just need to make sure you wash them regularly and that

your body is clean when you put them on, too.

You should also change the sheets on your bed for fresh ones

every one to two weeks. The sweatier you are at night, the

more regularly you should switch your sheets!

Skin and Spots

Every inch of your skin is covered in hundreds of

tiny glands which produce and release substances, like

sweat or oil. Sebaceous glands are a type of gland which

release oil, also known as ‘sebum’, into your skin to keep

it healthy. When you begin puberty, these glands respond

to the hormones rushing round your body and start working

overtime, making more oils. They are especially sensitive

to testosterone, and the more testosterone in your body,

the more oil they will produce.

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Though these oils help keep your skin moisturized and stop it

from drying out, they can also cause spots or acne. Acne is mainly

caused by the hormone changes that are happening in your body.

A build up of oil and bacteria on the surface of your skin can make

it easier for spots to form. These things clog up your pores, along

with your follicles (the places the tiny hairs on the surface of your

skin grow from). When a clogged pore is on the surface of your

skin, it can make a whitehead. Sometimes a clogged pore stays

open, which is called a blackhead. The bacteria on your skin can

make spots bigger, more inflamed and sorer, too!

Annoying Acne

I had acne as a teenager, which started when I was about

fourteen. I tried lots of things, like washes and creams, to try

and help my skin. But then when it still didn’t get better, I went

to visit the doctor for some treatment. After that, my skin got

Blackheads

Blackheads

Whiteheads

Whiteheads

Acne

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lots better! This lasted until I was about twenty-seven, then all

of a sudden, my acne came back! Now I am thirty-two, and still

have problems with acne. Part of my problem is that I am really

bad at not picking my spots, which makes them worse and

scars my skin!

Even as an adult, having acne has made me feel very self-

conscious at times, always wondering if other people are

noticing my spots. I just try and tell myself that everyone else

is more interested in themselves and aren’t looking at my skin!

Or I try and focus on other things I like about myself, like my

hair. I wanted to share this with you so that you know if you

are worrying about acne, you aren’t alone! It is so important

to speak to someone if your skin is getting worse and it is

bothering you. The earlier you get treatment, the fewer issues

you will have with things like scarring. Acne is such a common

problem – it’s not embarrassing at all – and can be treated.

Recently, I saw a doctor again and they are helping me try new

treatments to make it better. So don’t be ashamed – speak to a

grown-up if your skin is troublesome!

Sadly, there’s no sure way to prevent getting spots or acne.

Almost every teenager has a few spots, and about one in five

teenagers will have sufficient problems to need to see their

doctor to get some help treating their skin. However, there

are some things you can do to try and reduce how often

you break out and how serious your breakouts are:

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It’s important to wash your skin, especially after exercise, to

remove excess surface oils and dead skin cells that clog your

pores. However, over-washing can actually damage your skin,

by drying it out or irritating spots that are already there, so

don’t go scrubbing every five minutes!

If you use products on your skin, like creams, lotions or make-

up, choose ones which won’t block your pores, known as ‘non-

comedogenic’ or ‘non-acnegenic’.

If you can’t live without hairspray or styling gel, try to keep it

away from your face when you use it, as it’s likely to include

sticky oils that can make acne worse.

If you get acne on your chest or back, avoid wearing tight

clothes, which can rub and cause irritation.

Q: Should I pop my spots?

A: The short answer is: no, you shouldn’t. Popping them

won’t always get rid of them, and may clog up your pores

even more! You might even end up causing an infection,

or giving yourself a scar. Your spots will go away on their

own, so by far the best option is to be patient, and wait

for a pimple to disappear. If you really can’t stop, and

Ask Doctor Emily

59

must pop, then there are a few things to bear in mind:

• NEVER pop a red, purple or brown spot without an

obvious head. It will be very sore, and you’ll do more

damage than good.

• ALWAYS wash and dry your hands before touching

your face.

• Rest a warm and clean flannel on your face for a few

minutes, to help soften the skin around your spot,

making it easier for it to just pop on its own.

• For a whitehead, use clean tweezers to gently poke

the centre of the spot. It should pop and drain away. If

it doesn’t, it’s probably not ready to pop, so leave it be!

Don’t use your fingernails in place of tweezers, as they

could damage your skin and spread bacteria.

• For a blackhead, put cotton pads around your

fingertips and press gently inward towards the spot. If

the content doesn’t come out, then stop squeezing.

Again, the spot might just not be ready.

Part Two:

CHANGES IN YOUR MIND

Changing Brains

Over the last few chapters, you’ve discovered some of

the changes that will happen to your body, but there are

some major things happening in your mind, too! Your

emotions, ways of thinking, and even parts of your

personality are about to go on a wild ride, but once

you’ve ridden the rollercoaster, things

will settle down!

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You probably feel much more grown up now than you did five

years ago, and in five years’ time, you’re likely to feel different

again. This doesn’t mean you’re going to transform into a

completely new person, but your brain will go through a few

changes over the coming years.

When we’re very little, we think everything revolves around US.

Our whole world is made up of our family and close friends. But

as we get older, we start becoming more interested in the wider

world. You might start to follow the news, and take an interest in

people from different places or cultures. As teenagers, people

often feel more connected and engaged with the world around

them. Take someone like Greta Thunberg – as a teen, she

became so passionate about fighting global

warming and climate change that she

started a worldwide movement! Not all

of us can be as amazing as Greta, but

she’s a good example of a teen who

opened her eyes to an important

issue. Her story also shows what a

huge difference young people

like you can make if you set

your mind to it!

Your brain is made up of

lots of different sections,

which all have important

jobs to do. The earliest

62

changes in your brain happen when you’re about eleven

years old. The front part of your brain – called the frontal

lobe – starts to get more powerful. It’s the part of the brain

that controls your impulses and stops you from making rushed

decisions, and it’s done a lot of growing up already! If you

know any toddlers, you’ll notice that they are NOT very rational

and rush into lots of impulsive decisions – for example, if

there was someone holding a bag of their favourite sweets on

the other side of a road, they would probably try to run over

and grab the sweets without looking whether any cars were

coming! As you get older, your frontal lobe develops; it’s what

helps you remember to slow down and look first, before you

cross that road. You still want the sweets, but the sensible bit of

your brain says they’re not worth running in front of traffic for!

Taking Risks

However, that front part of your brain isn’t fully developed until

you’re around thirty years old, and there’s another part of your

brain that develops during puberty which starts encouraging

you to try new things. This is helpful in some ways – there are

loads of new things you’re going to want to try as you grow

up, from learning to drive to living on your own or with friends.

However, this part of your brain can sometimes be unhelpful,

as trying risky activities without fully assessing the situation

can be dangerous! For example, if you’ve never mountain

biked before, but decide one day to try it out and go down the

toughest, most advanced slope, there’s a chance you’ll end

up hurt. Or if you decide to try smoking or drinking alcohol

63

without stopping to think whether it’s a sensible and safe idea

first, you might run into trouble there, too. Making a decision

without thinking it through is not always a wise move.

You’ll probably make a few mistakes during your teenage years

– everybody does! But learning from these mistakes is what

helps us grow into independent and confident adults. By the

time the ‘sensible’ front part of our brain gets in full control,

we’ve generally worked out our limits and can enjoy life as a

grown-up in a safe and happy way.

First Crushes

As you grow up, you might start feeling attracted to other

people in a more-than-friends way. It might take you a while to

realize, but if you find yourself thinking about someone AlL ThE

tImE, imagining getting close to them or even kissing them,

chances are you’re feeling attracted to them. If both of you feel

the same way, you may want to start a relationship. This may not

sound like you now, but it is something that most people do feel

like at some stage as they get older, for example as a teenager

or an adult. Some people have their first close relationship as

a teenager, and some people don’t have their first relationship

until they’re in their twenties. There’s no rush, and you shouldn’t

feel pressure to start having crushes on people or getting into

a relationship until you feel ready.

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Ups and Downs

As you go through puberty, all the hormones in your body can

play havoc with your emotions. Add to that all the changes

going on in your brain and you might find yourself flipping

between feeling fine one moment, and down in the dumps the

next. There are all kinds of emotions your brain can feel, and

it’s a good idea to get to know them.

Next time you’re feeling a bit rubbish, try to pinpoint exactly

what emotion you’re going through. Do you feel…

And when you’re feeling good, you could take a moment to

think about that too. Do you feel…

Stressed?

CONTENTED?

tired?

CREATIVE?

BOReD?

PrOuD?

HAPPY

LOW?

LONELY?

HOPEFUL?

WORRIED?

PEACEFUL?

SAD?

CONFIDENT?

Understanding your emotions is the first step to being able to

manage them. If we know that we’re stressed, for example, we

can recognize that we need to put aside some time to relax or do

something fun, before returning to whatever task is stressing us out.

However, even if we understand them, sometimes emotions

can still be tricky to manage. Life is full of challenges, and

over the next few years you’re likely to experience some

tough ones, from exam pressure to falling out with friends.

Sometimes, these BIG life things lead to BIG emotions that

can get the best of us. If this is happening to you, the first thing

you should do is tell somebody you trust, like a parent or other

family member. Sometimes, it can be easier to talk to someone

who is a bit more distant from the worries you are facing, like a

teacher or counsellor. Chatting through how you’re feeling with

someone might help you to see things a bit more clearly.

As well as talking to somebody else, remember to talk to

YOURSELF kindly. When we’re feeling pants, it’s easy for the

little voice in our head to turn nasty, and tell

us we’re embarrassing or useless.

Instead, try to remember that you

are amazing, unique and loved.

You can even say some positive

words to yourself in front of

your bathroom mirror – saying

things out loud helps your

brain to believe them!

“You don’t need

to be perfect – you’re

amazing just the

way you are!”

“Aw,

thanks!”

67

Q: I’m feeling down ALL the time. Is that

normal?

A: It’s normal to experience ups and downs as you go

through puberty, and you’re likely to have some new and

confusing emotions. However, if you’re worried about the

way you’re feeling then it’s important to ask for help. You

might feel that you’re not enjoying activities you used to

like doing, or that you’re worried or stressed all the time.

If you’re having difficulty getting to sleep, or concentrating,

or you don’t feel like eating, then these are things you

should talk to someone about, too.

Our mental health – which means the healthiness of our

minds – is really important. Everyone has times that are

more stressful l or difficult during their teenage years. If

you’re struggling then it is nothing to be ashamed of, but

it is something to address rather than ignore. It is not your

fault that you are feeling the way you do, and you are not

alone: lots of people struggle with their mental health at

some point during their lives. Speak to someone in your

family, a teacher or a doctor about what you are going

through. There are also some phone numbers for mental

health helplines at the back of this book, which you can

call if you feel like you need to talk to somebody.

Ask Doctor Emily

Body Confidence

In the ‘Changing Shape’ section, we talked about how girls’

bodies change to be different shapes during puberty. All

bOdies are wOnderful, whatever shape or size they are, but

it’s really easy to compare our bodies to someone else’s and

wish we looked like them. It’s common to think about whether

our bodies are normal or not, but for some people, this can

turn into something they worry about a lot. They might get

obsessed about a part of their body they wish they could

change, or even look in the mirror and not see themselves for

what they truly look like.

69

Having a healthy body image means accepting your body

and the way you look. If you feel good about yourself, then

you’ll feel happier overall and get more out of life. This will

also mean you have good self-esteem, which means you see

yourself in a positive light, and as someone worthy of respect

from others, which you are! Like we talked about earlier, by

looking at yourself as a whole person, and not focusing on the

little bits of yourself you might not like, you can boost your

self-esteem. The way you look is only one small part of what

makes you, you. Your brilliant personality, your achievements,

your passions and your skills are all much more important.

Q: Why don’t I look like the girls I see on

social media?

A: It’s important to remember that lots of the photos we

see online or in magazines have been taken by professional

photographers, or with flattering lighting, and edited to

make the people look flawless. Spots, stretch marks,

wrinkles or blemishes have been removed, and body parts

might even have been tweaked to look bigger or smaller.

So try to remember that when you wish you looked like

someone you’ve seen online, they might not look quite like

that in real life themselves! They’re still beautiful, of course,

but they have flaws like every other human. Try to stay

focused on doing the things you enjoy, and keeping your

Ask Doctor Emily

70

body healthy, instead of worrying about the tiny details of

what you look like.

The other thing to remember is that social media tends to

only show one side of someone – their appearance –

without showing all the other things that make them

amazing humans, such as their sense of fun, their kindness,

or their funniness. On social media, we can only view

photos and videos, which don’t often show these more

important parts of a person, which you only get to know

when you meet them.

Stay Safe Online

Please remember the golden rules of online life:

Think about waiting until you’re 13 to use social media.

Keep your location and personal information private.

Be smart – don’t agree to meet face-to-face with an online

friend, or send them photos of yourself, until you’ve spoken to

an adult you trust.

Report anything abusive or that makes you feel uncomfortable

to a trusted adult.

Remember your digital footprint – everything you post online

is permanent.

Healthy Habits

A perfect body is one that works just the way it should,

and not one that looks a certain way. To feel good about

ourselves and keep everything in our bodies working properly,

we all need to do regular exercise and eat well. It’s important

to have a good relationship with food, where we understand

what things are good for us, and which are better to have as a

more occasional treat. Our body needs a balance of different

kinds of foods, so it can get all the nutrition it needs for all

its different functions.

72

Here are some tips for eating healthily:

Eat lots of fruits and vegetables. They’re packed with vitamins

and minerals that keep your body healthy. You should aim for

around five portions a day – a portion is about a handful.

Be aware of how much sugar you eat. Sugar isn’t only in

sweets and chocolate, but often hidden in food and drink that

looks healthy, like fruit juices and breakfast cereals! Having too

73

much sugar can cause problems like tooth decay, so it’s best

to save foods high in sugar for an occasional treat, rather than

having them every day.

Drink lots of water. You need about six to eight cups of water

a day to feel at your best, and even more if it’s hot or you are

exercising. Your body is made of about 60% water, so it needs

regular top-ups to replace what you wee or sweat out!

Eat foods high in protein and Omega-3. Omega-3 are special

types of fat which play an important role in keeping your body

healthy. If you eat fish, salmon, tuna and cod are bursting with

beneficial Omega-3. If you’re vegetarian, eggs, nuts and seeds

are an excellent source of protein and also contain Omega-3.

Watch out for saturated fats. We all need some fat in our diet

to keep us healthy, but saturated fats aren’t good for our bodies.

They’re in foods like cakes, biscuits and fatty meat, and you

should try not to eat too much of them in your day-to-day life.

Q: I’m worried about how much I weigh.

What should I do?

A: Lots of people worry about how much they weigh, and

think it might be too high or too low. How much you weigh

F

r

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i

t

s

a

n

d

V

e

g

e

t

a

b

l

e

s

C

a

r

b

o

h

y

d

r

a

t

e

s

M

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Ask Doctor Emily

74

will depend on lots of things, including your height and

your build. It’s not a good idea to compare your weight to

your friends’, as they are likely to have different body

shapes to you!

Food gives us energy, which is measured in calories. All

food has calories in, and how many calories you eat affects

how much you weigh. As you go about your day, you use

up energy, meaning you use up calories, so it’s all about

finding a balance between what you put in your body and

what your body uses up. When you exercise, your body

needs lots of energy, so it uses up more calories. If you

don’t eat enough calories, your body uses up the fat it has

stored and you become underweight. If you take in more

calories than your body needs to use, then your body

stores these calories as extra fat. Being very underweight

or very overweight as an adult isn’t good for you, and can

even shorten your life, so it’s a great idea to try and

maintain a healthy weight.

If you do feel worried about your weight, the first thing to

do is chat to your parents about it. They might suggest

visiting your doctor, who can reassure you that you’re

healthy, or talk to you about things that could help you

lose weight, or put it on, depending on what would be

best for you and your body.

75

Super Sleep

Because your body and mind are growing so quickly during

puberty, they need lots of energy. To have lots of energy, you

need to get plenty of sleep. If you want to feel your best, you

should aim to get about eight to ten hours of sleep a night.

If you’re having trouble concentrating, or it’s difficult to get up

in the morning, or you need a nap as soon as get home from

school, you’re probably not getting enough sleep at night.

Keeping Active

One of the best things you can do for your body is to

stay active! When we exercise, we build muscle, strengthen our

hearts and improve our blood circulation. Exercise is also good

for our minds, as it helps relieve stress and anxiety and boosts

self-esteem. It also produces ‘feel good’ hormones called

endorphins, which make us feel happy and calm. And exercise

doesn’t have to be boring! You might be someone who loves

jumping jacks or push-ups, but if you’re not, there are

lots of other things you could try…

77

Team sports are especially good, as not only are you exercising,

but you’re developing social skills, too. By taking part in a group

activity, you’re likely to make friendships and build bonds with

your teammates. And it’s not all about the highs! Going through

lows in team sports can help you build resilience, which is such

an important superpower to have in life. Resilience is the ability

to face problems and hard times head on, and bounce back

from them. When playing a sport, you might build resilience by

getting through a gruelling game or accepting a tough defeat.

The skills you gain on the pitch or court can then be transferred

to other situations in life, and they might even help you get

through a stressful time. Say you fail a test at school or fall out

with your friends, you’ll have built enough resilience to quickly

recover from the situation and come back stronger!

HOCKEY

RUNNING

WALKING

ROLLERBLADING

CyClInG

PlAyInG iN ThE pArK

NETBALL

JUDO

DANCING

RUGBY

ICE SKATING

FOOTBALL

78

A scientific study discovered that young people who play

team sports might be less likely to develop mental health

problems, like anxiety and depression, when they’re older.

Drugs, Drinking and Smoking

As you grow up and become more independent, you’ll be

faced with lots of choices. Sometimes, these choices are going

to be tough, and the decisions you make can have an impact

on your life for years to come. For example, you might have

friends that start drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes or taking

drugs. You may feel pressure to try them too, even if it’s not

really what you want to do.

In the UK, if you are under eighteen years old, it is illegal for

you to buy alcohol or have alcohol bought for you. It is illegal

to take drugs at any age. This means that if you get caught

doing these things, you could be arrested, fined money or

get a criminal record, which might make it harder for you to

get a job or travel abroad when you are older. In addition to

being illegal, drugs and alcohol are harmful to your body.

Some drugs can be very dangerous. They can make you

incredibly ill if you take too much of them, and even put you

at risk of dying. Many are also addictive, meaning that if you

try them a few times, you may find you crave them again and

again, making it difficult to stop taking them. Alcohol can

also make you very unwell if you have too much of it, and can

DID YOU KNOW?

79

change your behaviour so you’re more likely to take dangerous

risks. It’s best to wait until you are legally old enough to try

alcohol, then have a small amount at a time to avoid feeling

out of control, or being ill the next day.

These days, there’s a much better understanding of the

dangers of smoking than there was fifty years ago, when lots of

young people used to do it. Like drugs and alcohol, smoking

cigarettes damages your body, filling your lungs with harmful

substances and putting pressure on your heart, too. You might

have heard that e-cigarettes or vaping isn’t as bad for you as

smoking, and while that might be true, inhaling any chemicals

(in this case, nicotine) into your lungs is not likely to be good

for you! Vaping can also be addictive, and sometimes leads

people on to smoking cigarettes. It’s also such a new thing

that more studies need to be done to make sure the chemicals

aren’t doing damage that we’re not aware of yet. With that in

mind, it’s best to just steer clear!

Be True to Yourself

As we grow up, we get to know ourselves better than we ever

have before. Trying new activities, exploring new ideas and

making new friends helps us to work out the kind of people

we want to be as adults. This book has focused on the physical

and mental changes in female bodies and minds. But what

does it mean to be female? Female and male are words used

to describe somebody’s sex – basically which body parts you

are born with. If you are born with female body parts, doctors

put ‘female’ on your birth certificate. But there’s another

word we use to talk about being male or female, and that is

‘gender’. This is slightly different because, while the term ‘sex’

refers to our bodies, ‘gender identity’ can refer to how we feel

about ourselves, regardless of what body parts we have.

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As we discussed earlier in the book, our identities are made

up of so much more than what our bodies looks like, so even

if you think you know someone’s sex or gender from the way

they look, you may not be right. It’s really important to respect

everyone’s feelings about who they are. Some people might

be born with male body parts, but feel deeply that inside their

heart and mind they are female, or vice versa. It can take many

years for someone to be sure that their gender identity isn’t

the same as the sex they were born with. If you feel confused

about your identity, then it’s important to chat it through with a

parent or doctor. In time, things that are really unclear as you’re

growing up can fall into place and become just ‘part of you’, so

never hurry yourself to fit into any particular label or group until

you really know what you want that label to be.

Smashing Stereotypes

Whatever being a girl means to you, it shouldn’t ever include

looking or acting a certain way. In the past, girls and women

had lots of limits put on them. They weren’t expected to

have jobs, but to stay at home and look after a husband and

children. People didn’t think they should go to university, or

vote in elections. Luckily, times have changed, and most

girls and women can now do what they want and be

whoever they want to be. Some women choose to have

children, and some people choose not to. I have an amazing

job as a doctor, as well as a lovely family! Years ago, there were

no female doctors, only males. When I was at university, there

were actually more girls than boys in my year group. It just

82

goes to show how things have changed over the years. The

most important thing is that you work hard to achieve your

goals, whatever they are!

Different is Good

As you go through life, you’ll meet people from lots of

different cultures, backgrounds and religions, of all different

physical abilities and ages. Another word for the differences

between people is diversity. Diversity is something to be

celebrated – if everyone looked and acted exactly the same,

the world would be a very dull place! It’s important to respect

someone wherever they come from, whatever they look like

and whatever they believe in. We can all learn a lot from

each other! Choose to be accepting and understanding of

people’s different beliefs and abilities, and you’ll be helping to

make the world a kinder place.

Families, Friends and

Feeling Supported

When lots of things are changing, it’s good to have people

around us we can turn to for support and guidance; people

who will be there for us, no matter what. As you go through

puberty, your relationships with your friends and family may

go through some changes. When you’re little, you rely on

your family to look after you, to make you food and even tidy

up your things. As you grow up, you’ll start to take on some

of these responsibilities yourself and may find you want more

independence than your family is giving you! But it’s important

to remember that everyone still needs help sometimes, so

try not to push your family away and don’t feel bad about

admitting you need support.

84

Different Kinds of Families

There are all kinds of different family set-ups, and your family

may look a bit different from some of your friends’ families.

Some people live with both their mum and their dad. They

might be the only child in the family, or have lots of brothers or

sisters, like I did (FOUR brothers – argh!).

Some people live in a single-parent family. If their parents

have separated, then they may live with just one of them.

Sometimes, they might split their time between both parents,

and live in two different homes. Some people live with step-

parents. If one or both of their parents have chosen to be with

a new partner, they might call them their stepmum or stepdad.

If their step-parents have children from previous relationships,

then they are usually called stepsisters or stepbrothers. Some

people may live with two mums or two dads, in a same-sex

parent family – families come in all sorts of shapes and sizes!

Some people live in adopted families. You may have heard the

term ‘adoption’ and wondered what it meant. This means the

parents who gave birth to a child (the birth family) were not

able to look after them during their childhood. This can be for

lots of complicated reasons. Another set of parents (called

the adoptive parents) welcome the child into their own family,

where they love and support them.

85

Some people live with foster parents. A foster family provides

a safe and caring home for a child when birth parents are not

able to look after their children. There can be lots of different

reasons why this is. Sometimes children are in foster care for a

short period of time while temporary problems are sorted out,

sometimes it can be for much longer periods of time.

In addition to your family members, there are lots of other

people in your community who might be in your support

network. Some children have social workers, whose job it is

to look out for them and their family. School nurses and local

GPs are also good people to bring into your support network

if you’re worried about your health. Whatever your support

network looks like, there’s no normal! And remember, YOU

might be part of someone’s support network, too, so look out

for your friends and family members and be kind!

Part Three:

WHAT ABOUT THE BOYS?

We’re nearly at the end of the book, but there’s just

enough time to have a quick chat about what bOys gO

thrOugh during puberty. Puberty usually starts a year or

two later for boys than it does for girls. Just like for us, their

brain conducts all the changes using hormones, but different

hormones come into play. While a lot of the changes in girls’

bodies are due to the hormone oestrogen, in boys’ bodies it is

the hormone testosterone which has the starring role.

87

Testosterone triggers hair to grow on boys’ faces. They might

grow a moustache under their nose and a beard over the

bottom half of their face and their chin, but this takes a long

time and doesn’t usually develop until their later teenage years

or even their twenties. Boys often start to shave at around

fourteen to sixteen years old but don’t get full facial hair until

much later.

Testosterone causes boys’ voice boxes to grow, which makes

their voices deeper. Because this takes a bit of time to settle

down, their voice might get a bit squeaky every now and then.

Boys can feel embarrassed or self-conscious about this, so try

to be kind and not tease them.

Boys’ skin gets oilier and they might get spots or acne.

Testosterone also makes hair grow on boys’ bodies, including

on their arms, legs, under their armpits and around their

genital area. They might get hair on their chest, too. Boys’

body hair usually ends up being a bit darker and thicker than

girls’.

88

Like girls, boys go through growth spurts. As they get taller,

they may look a bit gangly for a few years. Later in puberty,

their muscles will grow so they’ll start to look a bit bulkier.

Boys’ body shape changes as their shoulders and chest get

broader.

Like girls, boys get sweatier during puberty, so often need to

start using an antiperspirant.

Boys’ bodies can’t make babies, so

they don’t have periods.

Boys’ penises and testicles gets

bigger. Their testicles start making

sperm.

89

A Tricky Time

The idea of puberty can make boys just as nervous as it can

make girls. Even though they’re not going through all the same

changes as you, what they go through can be awkward and

nerve-wracking as well. Like you, their thoughts and feelings

will be affected by the hormones in their body, so they can

go through lots of ups and downs. Sometimes, boys feel

pressure to keep their feelings bottled up and act ‘manly’,

so they might not let on just how low they’re feeling. Let your

male friends know it’s OK to share their feelings, and try to be

patient and understanding with them.

In the same way you’d be annoyed or upset if someone

made fun of the changes you are going through, don’t poke

fun at the changes boys are going through either.

So what now?

AN AMAZING JOURNEY

And that’s it – that’s all you need to know about growing up!

Well, maybe not quite. Because, really, to learn everything

there is to know about growing up, you have to go through it.

You have to go over those highs, down those lows and travel

around those twists and turns. But now that you’ve read this

book, hopefully you’re feeling ready for the amazing journey

that is to come.

91

You’ve learned about the changes that will happen to your

body, from developing breasts, to growing hair, to starting your

period. You’ve discovered some of the thoughts and feelings

you might experience as you go through puberty, and why

these might happen. And you’ve also been given some tips for

looking after yourself. That’s a lot of information to take in! But

the good thing about books is that you can read them again

and again. So, you can always flick back and check a chapter if

you’ve forgotten some of the information in it.

I hope you’re feeling confident and excited about your future.

I remember when I was getting ready to go to secondary

school, thinking how many changes I would go through in the

next few years. At the start of the journey, it can feel like such a

long road! But as soon as you begin, it just flies by. I ended up

being a really late starter with puberty, so was nearly finishing

secondary school before anything happened! So, you just never

know how it will be for you. The most important thing is that

you try and have as much fun as possible! Although teenage

years can be tricky, they are also an incredible time where you

learn all about the person you will become.

If you still have concerns or questions, there are lots of places to

go to for advice, and you can find links to some of these at the

back of the book. Grown-ups are a good source of knowledge

too, as they’ve already been through all this puberty stuff, so

don’t feel embarrassed about talking to your parents or a doctor

if you’re still feeling curious.

So, put your best foot forward and take a deep breath. It’s your

journey, and you’re going to do it your way.

Watch out, world – amazing, unique, confident

YOU is coming through.

Glossary

Acne A skin condition which causes spots and oily skin.

Body odour A smell made by bacteria breaking down sweat.

Breasts (boobs) The soft parts on the front of women’s and

older girls’ chests. Women have breasts so they can make milk

to feed their babies. (Not all women choose to do this though!)

Cervix The opening at the bottom of the uterus.

Discharge Whiteish fluid which cleans and moisturizes the

vagina.

Emotions Feelings, such as happiness, sadness or anger.

Genitals The parts of men and women’s bodies which are

involved in making babies. Girls’ genitals are mostly on the

inside of their bodies and include the uterus (womb), ovaries

and vagina. Boys’ genitals are mainly on the outside of their

bodies and include the testicles and penis.

Hormones Chemicals in the body that act like messengers,

telling your body what to do and when. Different hormones do

different things: some control the way you digest food, some

control how and when you grow, and some get your body

93

ready to become an adult.

Labia Folds of skin which cover a woman’s vagina.

Ligament A short band of tough tissue that connects bones or

supports muscles.

Oestrogen A hormone which plays various roles in the body,

including making breast tissue grow.

Ovaries The organs in female bodies which produce egg cells.

Penis The part of male bodies through which sperm and urine

are released.

Period When a bit of blood is lost from the vagina each

month. Periods start during puberty.

Pituitary gland A little gland in the centre of the brain that

organizes the hormones and messages the body needs to go

through puberty. Some people think of it like the ‘conductor of

the orchestra’ because it makes everything happen at the right

time and in the right order.

Puberty The physical process of your body and mind growing

into an adult’s.

Pubic hair Hair that grows near your genital area.

Sperm Special cells made inside male bodies which, if they

meet with an egg in a female body, can grow into a baby.

Testicles (balls) The organs in which sperm cells are made in

male bodies.

Uterus (womb) The organ in female bodies where babies

grow during pregnancy. It stretches to get bigger as a baby

inside it gets bigger.

Vagina A tube inside female bodies that connects the uterus

(womb) to the outside of the body.

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Useful Links

You can find out more about puberty and growing up through

the following links. There are also some websites you can visit,

or numbers you can call, if you are going through a difficult

time and need someone to talk to.

Periods

CBBC www.bbc.co.uk/newsround/56267456

NHS www.nhs.uk/conditions/periods/

Spots and Acne

KidsHealth www.kidshealth.org/en/teens/prevent-acne.html

NHS www.nhs.uk/conditions/acne/

Personal Hygiene and Keeping Clean

KidsHealth www.kidshealth.org/en/teens/hygiene-basics.html.

Body Image

CBBC www.bbc.co.uk/cbbc/findoutmore/help-me-out-body-

image

Healthy Living

British Heart Foundation www.bhf.org.uk/informationsupport/

support/healthy-living

NHS www.nhs.uk/change4life

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Mental Health and Emotional Support

Young Minds (Support for children and young people struggling

with their mental health) www.youngminds.org.uk

Beat (Support for children and young people suffering with

eating disorders) www.beateatingdisorders.co.uk

CALM (Listening services and support for anyone who needs

to talk) Helpline: 0800 58 58 58

www.thecalmzone.net

Childline (Support for children and young people in the UK)

Helpline: 0800 1111

www.childline.org.uk

FRANK (Confidential advice and information about drugs,

their effects and the law) Helpline: 0300 123 6600

www.talktofrank.com

Happy Maps (A great resource for each age group

discussing mental health issues)

www.happymaps.co.uk

index

acne 53, 56–8, 87, 92, 94

alcohol 62, 78–9

androgens 13, 45–6

bacteria 49, 51–3, 56, 59, 92

blackheads 56, 59

body hair 19, 45–7, 51, 87

body image 69, 94

body odour 49–51, 92

brain 10, 12–13, 25, 44, 49, 60–3, 65–6, 86,

93

bras 23

breasts (boobs) 11, 13, 15, 17–23, 28, 30,

32, 35, 45, 91–3

cervix 14, 92

clitoris 14, 31

confidence 65, 68–70, 91–2

crushes 64–6

discharge 32, 35, 45, 53, 92

diversity 82

doctors 7, 39, 41–2, 47, 53, 56–7, 67, 74,

80–2, 91

drugs 78–9, 95

emotions 9, 11–12, 60, 65–7, 92, 94

exercise 76–8

fallopian tubes 14

families 84–5

food 72–4, 83, 92

frontal lobe 62

gender 80–2

genitals 13–15, 19, 30–2, 46, 87, 92–3

getting to know your body 19

hormones 13, 15, 17, 20, 25, 30, 42, 44,

48–9, 53, 55, 65, 76, 86, 89, 92–3

identity 80–2

labia 14, 19, 31, 93

masturbation 19

mental health 67, 78, 94

National Health Service (NHS) 7, 94–5

nutrition 71

oestrogen 13, 17, 30, 32, 86, 93

ovaries 13–14, 16, 34, 92–3

penis 15, 88, 92–3

periods 11, 14–15, 19–20, 33–43, 53, 88, 91,

93–4

pituitary gland 12, 25, 93

pre-menstrual syndrome 42

progesterone 17

puberty 7–19, 20, 24, 28, 32, 34, 43, 44, 46,

53, 55, 62, 65, 67–8, 75, 83, 86, 88–9, 91,

93–4

pubic hair 11, 13, 18–19, 35, 44–7, 87, 91, 93

sanitary products 36–41

sebum 55

sleep 25, 67, 75

sex 16-17

smoking 78–9

social media 28, 69–70

sperm 15, 16-17, 34, 88, 93

sports 76–8

stereotypes 81–2

stress 42, 48, 65–7, 76–7

support 83–5, 94–5

tampons 37–41

testicles (balls) 15, 16, 88, 92–3

testosterone 15, 44–5, 55, 86–7

toxic-shock syndrome 39

uterus (womb) 14, 16-17, 34, 36, 40, 92–3

vagina 14–15, 17, 32, 34, 37–8, 53, 92–3

weight 11, 28, 74

whiteheads 56, 59